I have a friend who, every time she goes out for Japanese food, doesn’t look at the menu first.

She looks up. Is the waiter Japanese? Is the chef Japanese? If not, a subtle disappointment appears on her face, as if the meal has already lost half its points.

As if Japanese food made by non-Japanese people automatically becomes cosplay. And as if a Japanese chef, even if the sushi rice is as hard as an eraser is somehow still forgivable.

I sit there quietly eating, thinking: if today the Japanese chef is heartbroken, constipated, or being chased by rent, does his sushi still magically taste better?

But everyone feels reassured. Because “Japanese = authentic” is a formula that saves a lot of mental energy.

I had a similar experience visiting friends in Europe for the first time. When they found out I’m Chinese, their eyes lit up: “Wow! You must be great at stir-frying!” “Don’t you all use big woks?” “Can you teach us?” Me: 🙂 I’m barely on speaking terms with a kitchen knife.

In the end, unable to refuse their enthusiasm, I served a plate of tomato-and-egg stir-fry. The room erupted in applause, as if I had fulfilled some kind of ethnic destiny.

In that moment, I realized, they didn’t really want to eat my food. They just wanted confirmation that their imagination was correct.

We seem to need this kind of “quick categorization” for peace of mind.

Japanese → Japanese cuisine
Chinese → Woks
Germans → Rigorous
French → Romantic

One person appears, and an entire nation gets strapped onto their back.

I have a friend who’s dated boyfriends of different nationalities. With each new relationship, she unlocked a new “country culture achievement.”

She often says, “I really understand people from that country.” What I think is: you probably just understand one person.

But saying that would ruin the mood. Because we aren’t really trying to understand the world, we’re trying to make it feel simpler.

The main function of stereotypes isn’t understanding. It’s convenience.

We don’t have to relearn.
We don’t have to rejudge.
We don’t have to risk being wrong.

It reminds me of the blind men and the elephant. One touches the ear and says, “It’s a fan.” Another touches the leg and says, “It’s a pillar.” They nod at each other: Yes, we understand now.

In truth, no one has seen the elephant. But everyone feels reassured. This isn’t to say stereotypes are evil. They’re just a lazy way of understanding.

And sometimes, when we’re willing to look a little longer, listen a little more, and let a person simply be themselves, we realize the world is harder to categorize.

But somehow, it feels more real to live in.



—— XC Scribbles · 伍拾 L 🍣